The Most Important Relationship for Success
I do one very powerful action when I’m feeling down. This action can be done anywhere at any time, with a writing utensil and paper. I reflect on my life in the past week, and ask myself one question – What have you improved at? It is important to remind yourself of the good occurring in your life, including the small things you are grateful for. Reinstate positive energy, and train your mind to always look for progress. The most important relationship for your success is within you.
“The most important relationship for your success is within you”
The number one most important key to ensuring a successful future is being self-motivated. I find it that the reason a lot of people do not pursue goals that they know they want to accomplish, or any other goal, is because they are not motivated. What is motivation? I believe motivation is the act and deep willingness to accomplish something, and believe it or not motivation originally comes from within you. If you are not self-motivated, a lot of things will not get accomplished. Some people ask me, “Well how did you become motivated to dedicate yourself to graduate school right after undergrad, applying for numerous scholarships or working at a dream job?”
Honestly, you have to want it more than anything else. You must have the burning desire to accomplish your goals, and a deep willingness to “shoot your shot” at every opportunity you get. I encourage you to enroll at a college or university, apply for any scholarships you qualify for or for your dream job, enroll in that workout class you have been thinking about, cook that new dish you saw on Buzzfeed, travel somewhere new to get a new perspective on life or volunteer at a local non-profit that could use your help. Do this to not only better yourself, but also to improve the communities you come from and the world we live in. Your goals are bigger than you, and you can accomplish them.
You are your number one fan, yet still your biggest critic. The reason most people fail at establishing an authentic relationship with themselves is because they are focused on everything but that. Take a company for example. In Social Media: How to Engage, Share, and Connect by Gina Luttrell, Syracuse University professor, asserts that most companies, “attempt to mock or rush the process of developing relationships.” Luttrell pinpoints that the areas focused on too often are the advertising and marketing departments, which was true back when I rented movies and games from Blockbuster. The text continues, “the primary function of advertising is to sell goods and services while the goal of marketing is to achieve the economic objectives of an organization through the processes of promotion, sales, and distribution of products or services.” However, as Luttrell points out, neither of these two areas are fundamentally designed to cultivate authentic relationships with stakeholders.
In psychology, there are two main types of motivators–intrinsic and extrinsic. According to Business Dictionary, intrinsic motivators are those stimulants that drive an individual to adopt or change a behavior for one’s own internal satisfaction or fulfillment. An example of an intrinsic motivator could be pursuit of knowledge, curiosity, enjoyment, achievement, etc. On the other hand, extrinsic motivators are those behaviors that are driven by external rewards. An example of extrinsic motivators could be money, praise, fame, etc. I personally believe that intrinsic motivators are the most important for individual success. It allows one to build a deeper connection to themselves and their goals. It gets you through tough times and those moments when you just want to quit. Usually, these are moments when you might be alone and therefore are only relying off of your own thoughts. But you are not a quitter, right? Good because in order to win and be successful, you have to be a fighter. Not as in “meet me outside” or “it’s on-sight” kind of talk, but I mean not allowing seemingly daunting obstacles to overcome your intrinsic desire to succeed. Essentially, a large part of your motivation should be self-applied, which springs from a direct relationship between the individual and the situation. Similar to business, the situation won’t be any better if the relationship with the individual is not there then.
It’s not every day that you get to see one of the individuals you look up to. So, when I heard that one of my role models would be visiting Syracuse University, I was ecstatic. Her entire interview on stage was phenomenal, and I was able to learn a great deal about the entertainment industry and being a creative.
However, it was one statement that she shared that stuck with me ever since. It was simple, but it was true. She said, “no one is going to care about what you’re working on more than you.” And that was true. When I heard this, I knew that what she was talking about was keeping that feeling, “the fire”, in your heart alive and fostering an authentic relationship with yourself…to better yourself. Relationship building begins from within, and just like a rose, it will vibrantly sprout outward for the world to see.
I want you to accomplish your goals, stay motivated and realize you are the key to your next step.
Share your thoughts with me below. What are your personal motivation tips? Did this post help you in any way? I would love to hear your feedback.